10. Tickets to the Oprah Winfrey Show – it’s taped in Chicago
9. Free parking – the City sold all it’s free parking spaces to Bismarck ND (for $500 and a block of ice, or something like that)
8. Peace and quiet in Times Square – this is where the “City that never sleeps” never sleeps By the way, there used to be a billboard in Times Square promoting tourism to Tel Aviv, Israel. I think they missed the boat by not saying “Tel Aviv – the City that never schleps”
7. A dull day – 75 museums, 3,000 retail stores, 18,000 restaurants, 100s of horse drawn carriages, 2 skyscraper observation decks, 50 sightseeing tours and one Statue of Liberty!
6. A dull night – 38 Broadway theaters, over 100 off-Broadway theaters, 10 comedy clubs, and millions of lights in Times Square!
5. Neighborhoods that you see on Law & Order and CSI New York – not in midtown Manhattan. It’s one of the safest neighborhoods in the country’s safest major city!
4. Questions like ones that were heard in New York 20 years ago:
"What do you mean the guy carrying my bags doesn't work for the hotel?" "Should a cab from JFK to midtown have cost me $600?"
3. Oceanview rooms
2. Cab drivers obeying traffic laws
1. A tourist who isn’t having a great time
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